What infertility IS and IS NOT

In my last post I mentioned that to honor the Lord we must seek out wisdom and not remain ignorant in what’s going on in the world.  I have recently felt the responsibility to share some of the things I’ve been learning about infertility through research and my own personal experiences.

Many women (with good intentions) try to sympathize with the struggle of an infertile woman by suggesting that they are also suffering from infertility.  Although they are trying to relate and show love to her, this actually makes the infertile woman feel like her problem is insignificant.  Also, if the woman claiming to be struggling with infertility suddenly becomes pregnant without having ever been diagnosed or going through medical treatments, jealously and bitterness can become a temptation for the woman who is truly struggling with infertility. For this reason, I would like to share a few basic things about pregnancy and infertility.

• Pregnancy is the result of a process that has many steps including ovulation, fertilization, and implantation. If a consistent problem exists among any of these steps the result could be infertility.
• Infertility is the inability of a couple to become pregnant after at least one year (or 6 months if the woman is 35 years of age or older) of having unprotected intentionally- timed sexual intercourse.
• Infertility also includes women who can get pregnant but are unable to stay pregnant.
• Infertility is NOT the fear that you might not get pregnant when you one day start trying.
• Infertility is NOT the frustrated feeling after a few months of trying to get pregnant.
• Infertility is NOT assuming you can not have children because you have other medical conditions that may decrease your chances of getting pregnant (i.e. Endometriosis or Pelvic Inflammatory Disease) – Many doctors tell women when they are very young that they may have difficulty having children one day when they begin trying, this does NOT mean they are infertile!  For example, many young ladies find out they have endometriosis shortly after starting their period.  What they are not told is that 35% of ALL women experience endometriosis at some point in their life and of those, only 10% struggle with infertility. What the doctors are actually concerned about is that the woman’s body will make too many prostaglandins that in turn imbalance the woman’s hormones decreasing her chances of getting pregnant.
• Infertility can be caused by a problem within men and women.
• Infertility is determined by a doctor.
• Infertility should NOT be self-diagnosed.
• Infertility usually results in various treatments (oral medications, injections, surgeries, etc.)
• Infertility does NOT mean that the individual will always be incapable of reproducing.

So, with this knowledge, if you have never struggled with true infertility I plead with you, for the sake of helping the hearts of the many women who are, please just encourage your friend with scripture.  Do not try to relate to her situation, but instead point her to the only one who does fully understand and is in complete control over her problem, God!